Friday, June 24, 2005

bored yet?

last night i dreamt that i went back to my old hellhole work cuz i forgot that i quit. but my dream version of that bar put it in the first story of a vampire-brothel house from the seventeenth century. i was the only one dressed for the times. everyone else looked like morons. then one of the owners attacked me and i ran out with alot of money but left behind my shoes like cinderella. if cinderella wore black velvet corsets and fishnet stockings with a big poufy black skirt that was ripped in all the right places. okay, so i looked like a old english prostitute. whatever. i was rocking the look.

then i tried to have a nap just now cuz i got bored of packing my stupid apartment and feeling sorry for myself. i dreamt that i heard these words:
i ahm zee mahdonnah.

i have fuhqd up dreams.

so i came back to this little laptop, armed with a nutella sandwich on white bread cuz its the best and don't you try to tell me otherwise. leave me alone granola crunching hippies. i don't eat your crazy hippy food very much. the other crap i can buy tastes way better and i don't have to have cooking rituals to make it taste good. i had a bulghur wheat incident a few months back that i don't want to repeat. and couscous? fuhgeddabouddit.

i am now going to go back to bed and try to sleep. but i have a feeling that my stupid phone will ring a bazillion times tonight because i made a kagillion calls this afternoon pre-self-pity-fest looking for something extravagant to do.

i dont know how to turn my ringer down. i think i just might burn the phone. and kill my cats for being nocturnal assholes. if i can train myself to be nocturnal then i can train my kitties to be dayturnal.

if anyone has some spare vocabulary there is a empty void in my brain that needs to be filled with new words. and old words that noone told me existed.

this blog really sucks everyone and i wonder with all my might why anyone actually bothers to read it. i was getting about a hundred hits a day and i really want to know why. i'm back down to my 30-50 hits a day and that seems rather high considering the vapid nature of this thing.

hell i don't even really know why i called it i plead sanity. i think im gonna call it something else.
like 'i ahm zee mahdonnah'. i can go from no meaning whatsoever to some subconscious cryptic meaning. hold on to your hats folks its getting crazy up in here.

oh and visitor from rhode island... why did you google queenprocrastinate (my email address) to get to this blog? that makes me wonder if i know you and if you might be a stalker or something. let me know. i swing from egotistical to deflated so if i knew i had a stalker, it would give me that extra boost in times of need.

gnight dearest readers. i wish you all the best in whatever the hell you do with your time outside of indulging me with being my ever-present yet eternally silent audience.


Anonymous said...

I am the mysterious blog reader from Rhode Island. I, in fact, did do a google search, but am not a stalker. You may know me. You may not. Maybe in a few days you shall discover...

Anonymous said...

I just come by every day hoping for more nuddy pics of your in the shower.

not the girl said...

That's real nice of you, but last time I checked, this website doesn't fall into the 'nuddy pics' category. I leave that to the plethora of porn sites out there. I might suggest checking some of those out rather than torturing yourself by coming back here.