My ass not yours

Sure, I'm young, good-looking and smart. And I am a smoker. And if that takes my desirablity rating down a notch or two, I don't give a flying fuck. Primarily because the only people who ever lecture me on smoking are old surly men who haven't had an erection in 32 years. And if my smoking makes their wrinkly penis that much more flaccid, then I have done the world a service.

I say make all public places non-smoking. But I better not be getting any shit for standing near a door having a cigarette. I also better not hear a damn word about my smoking on a patio beside a non-smoker. And if anyone dares to pull a shitfit about my leaving an event for 6.5 minutes to smoke, they can shove all the cigarettes that they aren't smoking right up their ass.

All I ask for is 6.5 minutes every now and again of peace and quiet. I would love to have my cigarette behind a restaurant, or outside a bar in the freezing cold while all the non-smokers have their run of the place. I don't mind. I just don't want any further nagging.

Thank you.