I don't trust anything on April Fool's Day. But I learned two things this morning that I hope so desperately are true:

1) Pat O'Brien is in rehab and some poor poor sod is stuck in the same rehab centre as the Master of Smarm. Please please let this be true.

2) I am being offered 200$ to get out of this apartment a week before my lease is up. The trolls that dwell in the apartment below me are moving to my apartment when I leave. They anticipate a mess so large that Mr. Clean would run away from it. Smart little trolls they are. The reason why I love this so much is because it gives me one last chance to piss them off... maybe I won't leave early. Suckers.