Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Foul Limewire, thou hast deceiveth me

I like surprises, I do. I love it when something wonderful and unexpected happens. Especially when I'm downloading things. Many a song I love, I came across while looking for something completely different.

I don't like today's surprise one bit.

I naively double-clicked on "MTV Mash Up: South Park and The Simpsons" (yeah okay, so even if it WAS that, it would have been really lame...) and some japanimation started. In Japanese. I thought, hey what the hell. This could turn out to be really funny.

It's just some young animated characters chatting and making really big mouths and then really small ones and the occasional giant tear dropping out from the back of their skull. But when one of the girls bent over and the prepubescent boys gawked at her exposed ass (her skirt was nowhere near regulation length), I knew something was wrong. Something was terribly wrong.

Within 20 seconds, these boys had this poor little animated character bound, gagged and half-nude on the floor. I used to watch Sailor Moon as a young girl and at this point, I felt like my very own childhood was being raped. (yeah, yeah, i know. sailor moon. i know. but i'm not the only one who liked something ridiculous... transformers? c'mon...)

The only thing remotely funny was when they pulled out various dildos and vibrators while a gong sound effect went off.

Then the damn thing froze my Winamp. So I had to ctrl-alt-del myself out of there before the frozen close-up of an animated vagina being penetrated by 3 different objects traumatized me futher.

I have nothing against porn. In fact, I'm pro-porn. But I'm not pro-child porn. I'm not pro-rape-the-bitch porn, either. And now, I think I'm against japanimation porn as well. It just doesn't seem right to defile CARTOON CHARACTERS. Especially not in a childlike or raping fashion. Not cool.

I learned a valuable lesson today: be careful what you download.

And for all you creeps who want me to send you this porn, too late, suckers. It got off my harddrive faster than a young japanime character can cum seconds before I started this post.

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